Buying Adult Props for a Play & Robert Downey Jr.'s Kung Fu | Ep 70

MAX: 00:12
Welcome back to two unemployed actors. I'm Max. I'm Sam. We have a great show today. We're going to give you a debrief on Lipstick, the play that's finally finished. I say finally for performances, but anyway, it felt like a long lot longer. Um and what else are we going to do? Well oh yeah, talk about what to do once you finished your big fun fantastic project as an actor because then you know you're immediately unemployed again. Um you got the blues. Exactly. So what what to do uh immediately after? And um Sammy, you're gonna catch up about uh well, your film's wrapped.

SAM: 00:44
Film is wrapped. Yay! So we wrapped on the 31st.

MAX: 00:48
Was it a run to the line? Like you literally trying to get everything captured, or was it sort of planned okay?

SAM: 00:54
No, no, no, but the timing was good, but so so I fin I finished on the 30th. Okay. I left on the 31st in the morning, drove back to Sydney, saw Hamilton on the 31st, which is well done, because you love your musicals. Yeah, everyone everyone should go see it if you can, and they are expensive tickets. But fortunate enough that my parents love musicals too. Well done. Yeah, yeah.

MAX: 01:14
It's uh and it's the only place in the world you can see Hamilton at the moment. 100%. Thanks to how well we're tracking in Australia. Sorry to rub it in to all our international listeners.

SAM: 01:22
No, we are doing well, we are doing well. The morning after that, I went on a camping trip with the family. Right. And then midway through that, Jess and I went straight back to Newcastle for the rap party. Oh, of course.

MAX: 01:34
That's worth uh that's worth uh leaving a family camping environment.

SAM: 01:38
It was worth it. We got uh very, very, very junk. I imagine you did. It was great, headed back to camping, and that was a busy weekend, and then got back home and just jumped straight into it. So I I just finished working as an art assistant on shoot.

MAX: 01:54
Are you allowed to say which shoot?

SAM: 01:56
I am.

MAX: 01:57
Okay.

SAM: 01:57
It's called it's called wood chips. It was kind of like a it's an afters, it was an afters kind of um short film-esque kind of commercial for a company, like an architectural company.

MAX: 02:08
So they're commissioned by a company to do this and um away they went. So like a what would you call it then?

SAM: 02:16
Yeah, I don't know.

MAX: 02:17
Like a story of the Yeah, yeah, because I know that because there's a word for it, I know. There's gonna be some corporate speak that's that's there. Because you know, you you go to these corporate websites and then you're gonna have this intro video of how amazing they are. And it's kind of one of those. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. I know what you mean. Yeah. I just can't talk about it.

SAM: 02:35
But it's it's kind of like it's like the life the life of a door, and it follows this the from the tree to the Yeah, pretty much to to dum demolition. Um so that was cool. Okay. I played a little role in it, but did mostly artisting, and then was thrown in at the deep end and did some sound.

MAX: 02:50
Was that was that now did you get that job through um the online platform you talked about earlier about crew?

SAM: 02:57
I got that through uh Ramon, who was a director I've worked with before and he was directing this. So that was just a personal one.

MAX: 03:03
Because I remember you were looking into this online platform where for various levels of experience, crew, you can sort of see what's available.

SAM: 03:10
Yeah, they're just Facebook groups. There's Facebook groups. There's like there's like uh Australia Needs Crew entry level, and then there's Australia Needs Crew professionals and all that stuff. And speaking of which, I applied today uh for an art assistant role for on an actual shoot. Um like a paid one kind of big one. I don't think I can say which show it is. Yeah, um, but yeah, got it. And I'm waking up at 3 45 a.m. tomorrow morning. Oh yeah, yeah, but it's gonna be fun. That's good. I hope. Big budget? I think reasonably big. It's it's um I know you can't say it. Yeah, I actually I actually don't know much about it. But it's probably better that way.

MAX: 03:48
Says you're accidentally saying it.

SAM: 03:50
Yeah, exactly.

MAX: 03:51
Um but it's all good experience.

SAM: 03:52
It's gonna be fun, good experience. Yeah, just busy, busy at the moment. Shot a couple uh self-tapes today, putting my showreel together, all this stuff. Yeah, just jump straight back into it. That's crazy.

MAX: 04:02
What about you? Well, I uh first of all, fun fact, I saw a photo the other day of my old kung fu instructor. Okay, uh teaching uh one of his students who happens to be Robert Downey Jr.

SAM: 04:18
No way.

MAX: 04:19
My separation of anxiety separation anxiety, talking about Fred again. Uh my uh one degree of separation from Downey. Um yeah, no, so because I learnt um Wing Chung Kung Fu um as a as a like teenager in Melbourne growing up, it was great. And William Chung and his brother David Chung, so I learned mostly from David, but William did all the grading, so he's basically the grandmaster of Wing Wing Chung Kung Fu. Okay. And so I I got to advanced level and did sparring competition stuff with with the with those two, the dynamic duo. Yep. And uh because William Chung learnt from It Man in Hong Kong, and he got uh Bruce Lee to come across and do Kung Fu. Yep. Uh when he was doing all these Hong Kong street fighting stuff, uh, because it's not a sport like Taekwondo, it's it's you know, you beat the crap out of people. And uh and so there he is in uh so I've learned the instructor's name in LA, Sifu Eric Oram, runs the Wing Chung Kung Fu. There is, I think, uh yeah, so he's fully actually he was fun fact of the fun facts. Yes. So he was one of the youngest at 18 to be deemed instructor level, which is fantastic. Like to know how many years it took me to to get to to like advanced level like and it's full. I mean, like the grading, right, is like you have to learn when you get to an advanced level, you not only have to know the techniques at whatever they call it and be able to demonstrate your proficiency in them, but then the other part of the grading is they put you in the ring and you full-on go sparring with someone, and um you've got to be able to be applying those techniques under pressure. So otherwise you won't get your next next level.

SAM: 06:02
I did karate for a little bit. Okay, but that was okay. Same, same, but yeah, but different.

MAX: 06:06
And then Krab Magar, I tried, but and then Krab Magar is pretty brutal, but um but very I like to call it efficient Krab Magar. Yeah, but Wing Chung, um, it's all about using your opponent's strength against them, which suited me just fine, being the smallest in the class. Uh, because that's generally what would happen. Um so yeah, so there is uh visiting various instructors around the world as he does um and private tuition stuff, uh with Sifu Eric Oram and good old uh Robert Downey Jr. and whoever else they instruct over there in in um in LA.

SAM: 06:39
But it's a great So he's gone then, is he? Yeah, yeah.

MAX: 06:42
So he because he basically the story is right, my dad, my mum met in Canberra. So this is obviously before I was born, yeah. And he was friends with uh the brothers because they opened up a restaurant in China. In China, yeah, Chinese restaurant in Canberra. Yeah, uh before they were a restaurant in started teaching in Melbourne and opened up the school. Uh so when I turned up to s to to see if I could learn, because let me explain, like you've got to be, I think I had to be over 12 years of age to learn. Okay. So don't just teach kids, you've got to be able to sort of have some sort of common sense about you and be able to put a few um techniques together. So they I think because I was only nine. So David Chung showed me a few moves, and then William Chung said, Yep, okay, and gave me the nod. I'm sure it helped. Not my absolute proficiency, but the fact that friends with my dad. Yeah, for that. But uh and then and then he also taught an instructor who's now teaching on the Gold Coast, who my brother learned from when he was based on the Gold Coast for a while. And again, uh William and my dad caught up um on the Gold Coast a few years ago. So um man gets around. Uh he's 80 something, but he's absolutely formidable. He's like the fastest amount of punches within a minute. The one-inch punch that um Bruce Lee was famous for, he's great for with so basically we'll will put the bottom of the fist on your chest and just punch you and it will push you back. Yeah, phenomenal stuff. Anyway, uh greater parties. So but um but really interesting. So um uh it's small world. So I've looked at it, I'm like, that I know oh Robert Dan Jr.'s learning martial arts. That looks like that looks like the Wing Chung stance. And hang on a minute, that guy looks familiar. That's William Chung. I'm like, oh my god, brilliant! Uh well, when I go to LA, I know uh to look up C for Eric RM and start uh dropping in for some lessons. Oh yeah. Um I'll tell you why. It's funny what you remember, but it's been a few years, it's been a few drinks since doing that because when I did my uh one of my stints on Deadly Women, one of the many um with Oh, that's right, the fight scene, and the stunt coordinator happened to learn Kung Fu, Wing Chung Kung Fu. Yep. So we got to to play a little bit there, which was fine. I got to do a few extra moves, which is great, while the poor other guy just got to hit the man with the paper hammer. Hit the man with the paper hammer, and just before the just before this at action, um, by the way, with our budget, we've only got one paper hammer, so don't fuck it up. Oh my god. No, no pressure, not quite the same budget for like um you know, 10-minute fight scenes and and CGI that they've got in Marvel World. So we talked about Lipstick earlier. Lipstick, the play has finally finished. It I say finally finished because oh my god, it was like I had that script for over a year now. Yeah, like over a year processing. And and the whole and the whole purpose I've l I've talked about many times. The whole point was to like have keep it relatively fresh for when I was starting to rehearse so that I could because there's so much physicality to it. Yeah, the blocking is so complicated. Being a farce, it's all super fast-paced as well, so you can't sort of muck it up, it's a bit too noticeable. Um, and managed to do that by easily not looking at the script for like six months during the pandemic. But then um come show night, we it all it all came together. There were some moments when I made choices even in the moment that felt right on stage during the performance. Oh, okay. Even even then, still sort of refining and adjusting. And of course, every performance can be slightly different when you've got so many, like the seven of us all running around, literally, yeah, uh, through various doors, and that things are gonna be different each night, um, which allows you I I don't look at it as a problem, I look at it as an opportunity to sort of stretch a different and try something a bit different, which is really cool. Props was interesting because the character I played, Hank, is a maintenance guy, like a look, he's a landlord, he's not very good at what he does. He wears a he wears a tool belt, and I'm I'm ready to pack it going like a tradey going, oh I need these tools. No, I don't, no. It's Hank who's trying to fix things. So like the biggest feature was like a sponge, because that's the kind of guy he is, he'll be cleaning up more messes. Uh fixing the and yeah, and and and just a I went through a hardware store and spent like ten bucks on all these little bits and pieces. Oh yeah, and make it look somewhat legit. And then um, thanks to my KFC trading outfit that I still call a costume, yeah. Um and uh and there was Hank, but also there's a moment where okay, so it's a it's it's a queer farce where the premise is um there's two housemates, uh sorry, Anna's apartment, Mal's there, the best friend. There she's having a breakdown while she waits for the friend to arrive, doesn't know if the friend's gay, really likes her, and the Mal's mum turns up who's completely off the charts in terms of being able to relate to what's happening in the room. Um, there's Kara, the Mad X, who's my one of my favourite characters for being over the top, coming in and trying to win Anna back. Uh, I'm the landlord that turns out to be the father of the date that turns up, Kelly. Um and then Rowan had this great act, Rowan. He had this great uh montage of um because uh there's other guys turning up to meet Mal in the middle of it all, and that was Rowan's job. Okay, and there's one moment where there's a montage he has to play several characters, literally the door open closes, and he's wearing different outfits.

SAM: 12:34
Oh, yeah, nice.

MAX: 12:35
Um it wears me out just thinking about it. I don't know how he did it, but anyway, it worked. And um, I think it was just like it was just one of those things where we all got on really well, which is great because it helps, right, when you're rehearsing a couple times a week for so long. Yeah. Um, and I I mean, as much as I'd love to have that professional production where we're together nine 9am to 5 p.m. sort of thing for the few weeks leading up to it, and then away we go, it it was a bit sort of out of sorts, but it did it did come together, and I think that's down to the sort of personalities as well. Yeah, cool, and the director and co-director. So it wor it worked quite well. One moment though, Anna, like this absolute chaos and hilarity on stage. Literally, every character's on set, and she has to try and break it up. She picks up because she keeps accidentally giving sex toys to people by accident under pressure, like the mum master of back scratcher. Here, take this. Oh shit, it's a large dildo. It's a real comedy. Whoops. Uh, because even a cheap laugh's a real laugh, right? So and there's one moment she picks up the drill and she and that on that drill is an actual attachment. Um and as she pushes the drill, it anyway. So who's got a cordless drill? Oh, Maxie has. Um, great. Who has a dildo that can go on the ex end of the drill?

SAM: 13:52
Well, Maxie has. No.

MAX: 13:55
I did end up sourcing it though. I went to this okay, so this is a story, right? Okay, okay, okay. So um this is I go to this sex shop on King Street here in Newtown.

Speaker 1: 14:07
Yep.

MAX: 14:07
And I'm just walking in like it's any other store, going, okay, where are the dildos? I'm looking at the wall, going, first of all, wow, some of them are quite realistic. Sec and scarily realistic. Secondly, yeah, some of them are quite big. And then and then the and then I'm kind of standing there going, well, I I want it to be sort of real to get even the people in the back row to understand what what's happening.

Speaker 1: 14:32
Yeah.

MAX: 14:33
But I don't want it to be too real as to make them recoil in horror. And you know what I mean? I want it to be somewhat cartoonish. So I'm having this moment of actually studying the wall, uh, because it was quite a wall, um, to try and work out what's more appropriate. So anyway, I'm I'm I start chatting to the guy behind the counter, and uh we're having this great chat, and he's like, first of all, best original story I've heard in a long time, because I I told him I need it for a play, and this is the moment, this is the scene. So he takes it out of the packaging and holds it up and goes, Well, I don't know, that's very cylindrical. I don't know if it'll actually you know, I don't know if it's dick enough. So there we are having this very civilised conversation about what's too dick and dick enough and not too cartoonish but not too real, yeah, and a very serious conversation, and then as we approach the wall again, ended up upgrading upgrading me. I went to a different uh model uh that would have done the job uh better and and certainly did, um, and then got a discount for best original stories heard in a long time. Normally discount, normally five dollars off a thirty-five dollar yeah, prop. Um, which mind you is tax deductible, and that'll be interesting.

SAM: 15:44
Uh wait, so they're not paying the play isn't gonna pay.

MAX: 15:48
No, no, they have a budget, but it was very small, and to be fair, w our production took up nearly all of the prop budget for the other four productions together. Jeez. Like when you think about it, the different the amount of costumes, um, fitting out an apartment, uh, just even just a box of sex toys that are randomly people are using, like, you know, we're hi a it's not like we can borrow our friends, right? Everything's gotta be new and sterile and straight out of the packaging. That's true. Right?

SAM: 16:18
Yeah. Oh god.

MAX: 16:21
So so anyway, so it was a marvelous conversation, and um got the discount, walked out of the door quite happy with myself actually, uh, because I knew how I was gonna attach the end of the drill. Basically, just get a drill bit and drill into the base of it, and then away we go. If it falls off during the night, I could fix it, and it's even funnier if it does, anyway.

SAM: 16:37
Yeah, yeah, 800%.

MAX: 16:38
Uh so so anyway, unfortunately though, um I managed to walk out of the sex shop carrying my little brown paper bag um at the same time school's out. So got to walk about 500 metres home uh with groups of school children um making fun of me as to what could be in the paper bag. I threatened to show them at one stage that that shut them up.

Speaker 1: 17:00
Oh no.

MAX: 17:01
Anyway, so I managed to get home without without getting arrested. Uh and it was a great prop. It got some cheap laughs, so winning. But you never know. You actually got like a normal.

SAM: 17:12
It's pink.

MAX: 17:14
It's bright pink.

SAM: 17:16
I'll show you, hang on. No, oh god. Hang on. I'm just gonna get it, I'm gonna get it. You have it here. So it's gonna be somewhere. Oh god. Because I thought you wanted it to look realistic.

MAX: 17:35
Well, I want it to show what it is. This is a dildo on the end of a but I want it uh I know to too carto cartoony but suggestive enough.

Speaker 1: 17:47
Yeah.

MAX: 17:48
Here it is. This is Oh my god. So like you know exactly what it is by looking at it.

Speaker 2: 17:54
Yeah.

MAX: 17:54
But it's not Fred, no. No, Fred, not a toy. Oh god, let's oh that's just not right. Oh god. I uh I don't want you to take that to the dog park. We'll get questions. Yeah, how funny that would be, actually. Oh, for those of you listening on the podcast, um, well done on not not not being able to see it. Um you have to look at the YouTube channel to see what see what happened. But anyway, um Fred was getting too close to the sex stuff. Anyway, so lipstick, that just gives you an idea of what was it was it was about 70 minutes non-stop and uh we had great audiences. Uh we were really happy, and um I think the producers are really happy too. I mean the whole festival was sold out. Yeah. Which which is fantastic. I mean we're talking about just as restrictions eased for pandemic to sell out four shows in a festival. I mean yeah, we were excited. I think it sort of shows two people are just like, you know what, we've got to get out of the house.

SAM: 18:50
It also makes sense, like straight after co the COVID like uh restrictions that it would sell out. Perfect timing. Yeah, it was good timing.

MAX: 18:57
We were we were lucky because I've got to say we've postponed it twice already. Yeah. Um, but speaking of the my costume for lipstick, my KFC trading costume. Yep. I got to use it again when I did a MITER 10 shoot for a hardware store here in Australia. Um I think it was late last year, actually.

SAM: 19:15
I think you spoke about it a little bit.

MAX: 19:16
Yeah, yeah. Um it uh uh one of the videos dropped, which is great, of me building a herb wall. Oh yeah. Um I sent it to the crew lipstick to our cast chat to say, look, he's he's uh Hank being sensible in his handyman skills. Um I'm like also look how good I am I not not talking about the two guys who are actually doing it all behind the behind the scenes. Yeah. And um I'll share it on I'll share it on the Two Unemployed Actors Facebook page to under some of our social because uh and the other one coming uh in a couple of weeks' time is the big build, which is me doing a whole outdoor kitchen. That's the one where I nearly killed myself, where they're like, Oh, have you you've used when's the last time you used a um I don't I can't even know what it's called? Some power tour. I'm like, oh it's been a while. You might want to show me again, just you know, I'm like, I've got no idea what I'm doing. I've put pieces of wood on wrong, I put one on upside down, I drilled something in, the drill went the wrong way. Like stuff that was hard to try to it was it it took a lot of work to make me look like I know what I'm doing, basically. Um, but anyway, without being a hindrance to the shoot either, because you only get time for a few takes, so yeah, but anyway, um that aside, what happens is after a big fun project, and with a play, it's such a commitment, right? You know because you've done plays, musicals. Oh yeah, it's like there's so much build up to it, and then you have your run, and then boom, you just everything all of a sudden there's no big project on the horizon.

SAM: 20:50
No show blues is what we call it.

MAX: 20:53
I I I like to do all the boring stuff like um like you were talking about boring stuff, straight to Sam. Uh like you're talking about the um you know, doing your self-tapes, updating your show reel, yeah, all that sort of stuff, even just making sure all the stuff that's dropped while I was doing all the work for the project, um, so even the might attend stuff, whatever, is is in updated on my my showreel stuff, my presenting to camera, my acting show reels up to date. Um have I got the right photos up on all because there's like all those online platforms from IMDB to Star Now, the right fit, social media stuff, um, even LinkedIn.

SAM: 21:33
I mean like check it all.

MAX: 21:34
I know, there's lots to do. So there was that, um, and I'm sitting there updating one and I'm like, it's been a while since I've had a T VC, and no joke, I got a message as I'm thinking saying that in one of my voices in my head to the other voice in my head. It was a great conversation. Uh it's been a while since you had a T V C Max. That's true. And then I got an email a message uh through one of the online platforms saying, Can we put you on hold for a T V C? That's weird. I'm like, how weird is that? That is weird. Whether I get it or not, I don't know. But hey, that's true. I'll sit there and think about it again.

SAM: 22:07
Yeah. Actually, no, there's a similar thing. Like the other day, I was like, I haven't heard from my agent in a while, and then I got a text from him saying I've been short this is for TV C and I was like, yeah, similar idea. It's weird how the universe I know, right?

MAX: 22:17
Um, and the other point I'd like to make too is just to be clear on buyouts and stuff, because I know I've said in the past, um, not unlimited, not in perpetuity, but like to put a limit on it. So having I mean it's like give me a call, blah blah, and I knew straight away I'll just if if there's a phone number, I always like to call because you get so much more information. Yeah, sure. Um so having a conversation and she talked about how the client normally uses the creative for uh one to two years, um, and because it did say in perpetuity, like full buyout. Oh, yeah. It's easier, right? And you get more bang for your buck. Yeah, but from my perspective, uh no, I want to get paid every time you use it. Yeah. And if you can if you can if the campaign's gonna last one or two years, great. If it's a great campaign, you want to use it again while I get paid again. So I said, Um, okay, well that sounds great if if the if the client if your client um is looking to use it for like one to two years, then there shouldn't be an issue putting a two-year use usage in it. It's like, oh no, that should be fine. Like, I mean, if you don't ask, yeah, you don't get. Yeah. Um what's the so the time frame um and um the budget um and then you know, is it like a more featured extra role and having lines or that sort of stuff? Most of the time, um, when you just let them talk about the project and the client, they've answered 80% of your questions anyway, which is great. Yeah. Um, but don't be afraid to put your foot down and go, Oh, okay, well, if the if the client's campaign's only last that long, or or would you would would the client be okay with a 12-month usage or you know, happy to put that in writing, whatever, don't be afraid to say that. Yeah, 100%. Because they're they this is the sort of stuff that they talk about all the time with their clients and with talent.

SAM: 24:01
And then if they come back with a no, then that's your decision to make if you didn't want to do it, which is totally fine. Yeah, or if you don't want to do it. Exactly.

MAX: 24:08
Um but make sure you ask because sometimes we're just so grateful for the opportunity. Um, we're too busy saying yes to to read between the lines. Make sure you like and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform and social media and follow us on YouTube. I'm Max. I am Sam. And you've been listening to Two Unemployed Actors. Bye.

Speaker 1: 24:27
See ya. Two unemployed actors.

MAX: 24:32
You've been listening to Two Unemployed Actors. I'm Max. I'm Sam. And make sure you listen out from oh, that was horrible. Just let me do that again. I don't know if it's me today. All right. Make sure you like and subscribe uh on your favorite podcast. Oh, fuck.

SAM: 24:47
Let's start the whole thing in that's it. You've been listening to.